My Theory.

Yesturday, I was listening to the song "What Hurts the Most - Rascal Flatts."

people say that in life, you wouldnt be able to see the pain until you know wat its like to have your heart broken.In some ways its easy to agree with that because it is true, emotional pain is a lot more hard and painful to deal with. If pain is physical, you can simply apply meds or anestetics to conceal it. but emotionally, the more u hide it, the more its gonna hurt you, the more it's gonna stay inside until one day, it's gonna blow.

physically, it can be repaired.

emotionally, its gonna leave a scar .

there's medicine when you have a headache, a cast when you break a bone.

but what's there when your heart is broken internally? are you going to just take it out to end the pain?
for me, having my heart broken was devasting .not even close as bad as playing volleyball, running with a fractured bone in my foot.

I'ts amazing really. The night we broke up, I woke up in the middle of the night clutching onto my stomach.

Nothing was wrong with my system. Except for the fact that I felt like my insides just disappeared. I felt so empty and alone it was painful. Nothing hurt physically but that's because it felt like nothing was there.

The next day I woke up, it felt like my lungs were gonna close up on me. Hard to breathe and everything was heavy. I recognized this feeling from before. Depression. Really, a lot of the times I can pretend to be happy. But when I have that feeling, I can't even pretend. As soon as you hit a nerve, I would burst into tears.

I don't know if it's me. But really, nothing hurt more than that. Except now that I'm able to at least endure the depression. Endure it enough that the people important to me don't needa see how much it's hurting me. Enough that I can live a day pretending to be happy.

So that's my theory.

Physical pain is nothing compared to emotional.